Category: Staying sane (Page 7 of 12)

How fast should we go?

The “Low Tire Warning” light came on my car a few days ago. Because I was across town from where I live, I had to keep driving. Nothing felt odd; when I stopped I could not see a problem. So I went on. And later, I ran another errand.

Then I actually sat down and read the owner’s manual, which of course shook its finger at me and said you idiot, you shouldn’t be driving on these tires until they are checked for a nail, slow leak, or the beak of a mynah bird embedded in the treads.

I made the appointment at the tire center, and one morning, I drove my car there. Luckily I only had to go about two miles. But now armed with new caution, I drove more slowly than I normally would.

Translation: I actually went the speed limit.

And the reaction of other drivers was really interesting. Here I am, in the slow lane, going the speed limit. Here they are, puling up behind me so fast they look like they’ve been shot out of a cannon, slamming on their breaks and barely missing me as they pull into the fast lane and hit the gas.

 

Steering Wheel Vintage Ford

 

Now if this was rush hour, or we were on a busy expressway, I would get it. But we are on a quiet residential road, and there wasn’t any traffic. Yet my going the (gasp!) speed limit was clearly an offensive act.

I confess I usually am a bit over the speed limit myself. But I do not tailgate people in the slow lane. I’m not real happy about being behind slow people in the “fast” lane, but I still don’t tailgate. I can’t afford it.

I couldn’t help but wonder where these people were going that fast. What was happening to their blood pressure as they sped past me? What kind of mood did their own aggressive act put them in for the rest of the day?

What is that important?

I’m at a point in my boomer life where I’m looking at the highway stretched before me, and the distance to the end is getting shorter. There aren’t as many exit ramps or scenic overlooks. I worry that I’m missing things.

That I won’t realize when I should go off-road and take a break.

Or see the sights.

Or just get out and stretch.

Because literally, I won’t be passing this way again on the road of life, at least not in this form.

Sometimes those feelings make me go faster. Sometimes they make me slow down. Days go by so fast. Seasons are a blur. In my mind, there’s still all this “time” to do so many things. Yet I’m realizing that’s not really true. If I want to do something, go somewhere, try something new I had better do it now.

It can be very daunting, can’t it? Which path do I take. Which broken relationship do I repair, and which is better left alone. Which new road is worth my time and energy to explore. Like Yoga Berra said, “When you come to a fork in the road, take it.”

So which lane do we get in?   And what about the other “warning” lights?

“Caution:  you just passed up a potential new love.”

“Danger:  put down the candy bar and go to the gym.”

“Beware:  your hair may suddenly make a u-turn.”

Maybe, like my car, we just make stops when we need to, refuel, repair, and keep going.  Because like my very inconsistent GPS, we never really know where the road is leading. There could be a detour just ahead.  But one thing we do know:  it sure feels good to keep going.

“Map out your future’—but do it in pencil.”

     Jon Bon Jovi

Time to laugh.

We need laughter. Especially this year. So why not take a break and chuckle?

After all, here’s what happens when you laugh:

  • Laughter can cause the tissue that forms the inner lining of blood vessels to dilate and expand and thus increase blood flow
  • Laughter boosts immune systems
  • Laughter increases your pain tolerance
  • Laughter exercises your facial, abdominal and chest muscles
  • Laughter improves the function of your brain

 

file0001216055275

Need we say more? Let’s let some funny people do it for us:

 

“If you’re going to do something tonight that you’ll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.”   Henny Youngman

“I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.”   Groucho Marx

“There is no such thing as fun for the whole family.”   Jerry Seinfeld 

“If banks are so friendly, how come they chain down the pens?”   Alan King 

“One can never know for sure what a deserted area looks like.” George Carlin

“Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?” Robin Williams

 “Slept like a log last night. Woke up in the fireplace.”   Anonymous

“She said she was approaching 40, and I couldn’t help but wonder from what direction.” Bob Hope

“Housework won’t kill you, but why take the chance?”   Phyllis Diller

“If God wanted us to fly, he would have given us tickets.”   Mel Brooks

“I still feel 30, except when I try to run.”   Bob Newhart

 

 

Who are your favorite funny people? Please share…we need to keep laughing!

 

 

“If we couldn’t laugh, we would all go insane.”

       Robert Frost

Feeling left behind?

20150125There’s a lot of great things about growing older.

But there’s some tough stuff as well, like losing more people every year. People in your family. A spouse. Friends. Co-workers and past acquaintances.

Whether it’s the finality of death or a phone call that tells you someone has a terminal disease.

That just can’t be.

 She’s not old enough.

 He was just about to retire.

 We went to school together.

 She’s younger than I am.

How old does that make me??

It’s natural to feel some fear when you get news like this. It’s also natural to take a hard look at yourself, and then feel guilty because it’s supposed to be about them, not you.

Yet it is about you…and me…and how strange it is to age on the outside and yet still feel 25, 35, 45 on the inside.

I had a 93-year old neighbor once who was legally blind but every bit as alive and involved as she had always been. Her smile was a welcome sight every day. Yet she confessed to me that it was getting harder and harder because she had outlived everyone…her friends, her post loves, her anchors. I didn’t get it totally then, but I’m starting to now.

It feels like we’re all in lifeboats bobbing up and down at sea, holding hands, getting through all the storms and high waves together. Then more and more of our fellow life travelers fall in the water, disappearing, and the chain is not as strong as it used to be. Hey now, hang on a minute.

We’re all supposed to get through this together. We’re supposed to make it to the other side together. Don’t leave me!

photo-1428263197823-ce6a8620d1e1It’s even hard when famous people die, if we’ve identified with them our whole lives and they’ve become a part of how we experience each day. A singer who helped us escape the rigors of teenage angst. A sports figure that inspired us to work out harder because he or she never gave up. An author whose words pulled us through a life crisis.

Now they are gone, and we are left to fend as best we can. It can make me feel more exposed and vulnerable at times. And yet, I’m guessing what’s really happening is we are left with the essence of who we are…and sometime’s that a good thing. To “meet” ourselves without any filters or escape hatches.

All the people we have known, loved, liked, respected, or even disliked help shape who we are…and now as boomers and beyond, who we have become. But they are just part of the picture.

Depending upon your belief, you may take solace in that you will remain connected with them for eternity, that this is not a final goodbye. (That’s my belief, and in a few cases, I’m ready to really make sure they understand what they meant to me!) Knowing that can help ease the pain, and underscore how tight some bonds can be.

Here’s some nice words from the late poet A.R. Ammons:

 

In View of the Fact

 The people of my time are passing away: my wife is baking for a funeral, a 60-year-old who

 died suddenly, when the phone rings, and it’s Ruth we care so much about in intensive care:

 

it was once weddings that came so thick and fast, and then, first babies, such a hullabaloo:

 now, it’s this that and the other and somebody else gone or on the brink: well, we never

 

thought we would live forever (although we did) and now it looks like we won’t: some of us

 are losing a leg to diabetes, some don’t know what they went downstairs for, some know that

 

a hired watchful person is around, some like to touch the cane tip into something steady,

 so nice: we have already lost so many, brushed the loss of ourselves ourselves: our

 

address books for so long a slow scramble now are palimpsests, scribbles and scratches: our

 index cards for Christmases, birthdays, Halloweens drop clean away into sympathies:

 

at the same time we are getting used to so many leaving, we are hanging on with a grip

 to the ones left: we are not giving up on the congestive heart failure or brain tumors, on

 

the nice old men left in empty houses or on the widows who decide to travel a lot: we

 think the sun may shine someday when we’ll drink wine together and think of what used to

 

be: until we die we will remember every single thing, recall every word, love every

 loss: then we will, as we must, leave it to others to love, love that can grow brighter

 

and deeper till the very end, gaining strength and getting more precious all the way. . . .

 

heart-shaped-fluffy-cloud Life is precious. Grab it with all the might you have and celebrate your spirit, your soul, and your passion for living. Do it for yourself, and those who have moved on to a higher being. Rock that wrinkle!!!

 

“Being happy never goes out of style.”

     Lilly Pulitzer

Anticipating Spring

DSC_0326

 

Okay, so it’s not Spring.

But it’s not that far off.

We’re still in the midst of cold air, icy sidewalks, and shorter days.  But have you noticed?  The air smells a bit fresher.  The light is lingering longer.  And every once in a while, we are blessed with wonderfully warm days and bright sunshine that make us giddy with anticipation.

Spring is coming.

When these golden mid-winter days come, I love to fully take advantage of them.  Open the windows.  Clean out the car.  Dry rugs outside in the sunshine.  Take a big giant breath and let it out slowly, relaxing in the promise of longer days ahead.  It’s good for the soul.

In the spirit of what lies ahead (and to give those of us boomers and beyond who still face several winter and spring snowstorms), here’s some thoughts from Alfred Lord Tennyson that might give you cheer:

 

Early Spring

by Alfred Lord Tennyson

Once more the Heavenly Power
Makes all things new,
And domes the red-plowed hills
With loving blue; 
The blackbirds have their wills,
The throstles too.

Opens a door in Heaven; 
From skies of glass
A Jacob’s ladder falls
On greening grass, 
And o’er the mountain-walls
Young angels pass.

Before them fleets the shower,

And burst the buds, 
And shine the level lands,
And flash the floods;
The stars are from their hands
Flung through the woods,

The woods with living airs
How softly fanned,
Light airs from where the deep,
All down the sand,
Is breathing in his sleep,
Heard by the land.

O, follow, leaping blood,
The season’s lure!
O heart, look down and up,
Serene, secure, 
Warm as the crocus cup,
Like snow-drops, pure!

Past, Future glimpse and fade
Through some slight spell,
A gleam from yonder vale, 
Some far blue fell; 
And sympathies, how frail,
In sound and smell!

Till at thy chuckled note,
Thou twinkling bird,
The fairy fancies range,
And, lightly stirred,
Ring little bells of change
From word to word.

For now the Heavenly Power
Makes all things new,
And thaws the cold, and fills
The flower with dew;
The blackbirds have their wills,
The poets too. 

“Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet.”

Aristotle

« Older posts Newer posts »

© 2024 Rock The Wrinkle

Theme by Anders NorenUp ↑