Take a walk outside today and look in the eyes of anyone you pass. Some people wave. Some look at the ground. Others communicate their fear through wide eyes.

Others seem blissfully unaware of everything.

It’s okay to be feeling some fear. Fear isn’t something to run from, because you probably won’t get far from it. Unless you meet it head on, armed with truth. With faith in yourself and in your beliefs. With respect for the universe itself.

Having accurate information from experienced, educated, recognized medical and scientific professionals is one way of keeping fear from paralyzing us. Get the facts. Do what these people advise.

Let the rest—no matter how loud they bark or misconstrue reality—rave on.

If each of us can come to peace with the mix of feelings we have inside, maybe it will be easier to be a force of calm for others, including that stranger we pass.

Author, writer and Franciscan friar Richard Rohr has been expressing some wonderful healing thoughts these past few days:

“….We know that we are all in this together. It is just as hard for everybody else, and our healing is bound up in each other’s. Almost all people are carrying a great and secret hurt, even when they don’t know it. This realization softens the space around our overly-defended hearts…”

“…..Now is no time for an academic solidarity with the world. Real solidarity needs to be felt and suffered. That’s the real meaning of the word “suffer” – to allow someone else’s pain to influence us in a real way. We need to move beyond our own personal feelings and take in the whole. This, I must say, is one of the gifts of television: we can turn it on and see how people in countries other than our own are hurting. What is going to happen to those living in isolated places or for those who don’t have health care? Imagine the fragility of the most marginalized, of people in prisons, the homeless, or even the people performing necessary services, such as ambulance drivers, nurses, and doctors, risking their lives to keep society together? Our feelings of urgency and devastation are not exaggeration: they are responding to the real human situation. We’re not pushing the panic button; we are the panic button. And we have to allow these feelings, and invite God’s presence to hold and sustain us in a time of collective prayer and lament. 

“I hope this experience will force our attention outwards to the suffering of the most vulnerable. Love always means going beyond yourself to otherness. It takes two.” 

We each have a story to our life that includes pain and fear as well as joy and wonder. We must remember that when we look into the eyes of that man or woman on the street. That’s us we just passed. That’s our brother, wife, grandmother, best friend.

Take a breath. Go within. Connect with the power of Nature in some way. Spring itself is proof life is victorious after decay and desolation. Find a way to smile (they really are showing the National Rock Skipping Championship on TV). Pull out some old photos and go down memory lane.

Maybe it all will result in a kinder, gentler world. Maybe the hate-speak of ignorance will finally gasp its last breath. Maybe life will become even more precious to us all.

These are serious, scary times for sure. But maybe if we give a smile to that worried person in the park, the clouds won’t seem so heavy for just that one person—and maybe they will pass it on. Let’s give it a shot.

“Give a smile, lift a heart.”

There’s a lot to be afraid of these days.  If a highway shooter doesn’t get you, the newest virus will. Danger lurks in the Cheetos bag (because who can eat just one) and sugar and salt are hidden in everything you love (which is why bad foods taste so good). 

Politics are resulting in people going to the emergency room with heart palpitations and spikes in blood pressure.  Anyone who actually watches the stock market probably either keeps a glass of gin by easy chair or has started mumbling incessantly. 

You can’t win. It’s beginning to feel like the world is getting really, really small.

That’s the bad and the good news. Because when we think a problem is just too huge for us to do anything about, we tend to fall into inertia.  Gee, it’s a shame about that, but I’m so far away and there will be people there who can help.

But when that problem knocks on our door, is waiting inside our gym, our wallet, our hamburger or our sinus passages, things change.  Now we are engaged. We are paying attention. 

And we might actually listen to the experts.

Expertise has come under extensive attack in the last few years.  There seems to be a wave of “I know better than you” or “Why should I believe you” that has taken over the minds of a lot of people…many of them younger than us boomers.  In his book, “The Death of Expertise:  The Campaign Against Established Knowledge and Why it Matters,” author Tom Nichols takes a close look at this trend.

He writes:  “Americans have reached a point where ignorance, especially of anything related to public policy, is an actual virtue. To reject the advice of experts is to assert autonomy, a way for Americans to insulate their increasingly fragile egos from ever being told they’re wrong about anything. It is a new Declaration of Independence: No longer do we hold these truths to be self-evident, we hold all truths to be self-evident, even the ones that aren’t true. All things are knowable and every opinion on any subject is as good as any other.”

That’s pretty scary stuff.  It’s bad enough science is taking a beating.  Textbooks are being rewritten with events and people omitted.  So called “news” channels omit stories because they might be objectionable to their biased viewers.  What really should give everyone pause is how it’s become acceptable to just make up facts. To declare, “well, sure you read or heard that in the New York Times (for example), but they probably made that up.” 

Hang on.

Of course reporters at any publication can make something up.  But at a prestigious, proven news source such as the NYT, there’s a system in place to guard against that. It’s called getting multiple sources. It’s called confirmation.  It’s a legacy of holding to the truth. It’s not some manufactured TV network with pretty and handsome hosts giggling over the latest atrocity committed by the executive branch. 

As Nichols points out, the problem is when we decide we know more than medical researchers, more than the physicists and environmental scientists, more than the experts in climate and horticulture, and yes, more than seasoned, experienced, intelligent journalists.

When did we (ahem)…get so “smart”?

I hope that as boomers and beyond, we can remember how we grew up understanding there are always people shouting on the corner, and there also are people who truly follow an oath of honesty and accuracy.  People who study their professions for years and become certified as physicians, engineers, scientists, economists and psychologists.  They chose to dedicate themselves to achieving a certain level of expertise.

And they deserve our respect.  Because now is not the time to decide we know as much, or heaven forbid, more than they do about such serious matters.

Questioning authority is something our generation knows a lot about.  It’s a very healthy thing to always go. Frankly, I’m amazed that more people aren’t doing this everyday….questioning any blowhard that makes up whatever serves him or her.

THAT is who needs to be questioned.  Not the true experts.

So as the headlines come and go and fears rise about what’s happening the world and right where we are, let’s remember to listen to those who TRULY know what they are talking about.  The rest is just noise.

“An investment in knowledge pays the best interest.” Benjamin Franklin

It’s nothing new. It’s part of life. But it’s still hard to take sometimes.

The day/week/month when you feel like you’ve slipped over the side and fallen into a pit of saggy skin, thinning hair and inability to understand how to program a new phone. Dang it, inside you’re cool and limber and ready to go hear that band that starts playing at 10 p.m.

Outside, you’re yawning and really okay with watching reruns of ER.

Or is that you don’t want that look that the younger-than-40 set gives you when you enter any place catering to younger people…that “I hope he/she doesn’t die on my shift.”

The smile that is reserved for “older folks.”

The “how are we today?” greeting that could incite violence if you’re not only your best behavior.

How are “we” today?? WE are tired of being looked past, patronized, humored and dismissed! WE are wise, seasoned, contributing and more often than not totally cool people who own authentic tie-dye and saw Cher and Jane Fonda prior to injections.

We are 34 percent of the U.S. population—people over 50. That’s approximately 108 million. Almost 45% of us are still employed. We watch television. Eat out. Listen to the radio. Read books (yes, actual books). In fact, our spending contributes more than 8 trillion to the U.S. economy annually.

We buy houses. Take Lyft. Use apps.

Some of us drive down the street with our sun roof open and ZZ Top blasting out for all to enjoy. (You do know Billy Gibbons is 70, right?)

So it’s understandable that we might wince when we get a “ma’am” or a “sir.” Sometimes it’s just a sign of respect, or a figure of speech. But we all know those times when it feels a bit condescending, like we have to handled carefully because we might not be able to catch up.

GRRRR.

Not sure what the solution is, other than for younger types to remember we aren’t that far past you, and you might be real surprised to learn our interests are pretty close to yours. And maybe it also calls for some of us over a certain age to keep sharp, stay informed, and get out those Spencer Davis albums.

We can love where we are in terms of age. We have lived through some really fascinating times. We’re still going strong. Maybe we occasionally need to put some purple in our hair. Or just eat whatever Keith Richard and Betty White are eating.

In other words, stay young forever (in our hearts) and catch the early concert.

And never stop rockin’ it!

“I’m not old. I’ve just been young for a long time.”

Anonymous

It’s a new year.  A new decade.  A new life perhaps.

In our 20s and 30s, this would be grounds for a major celebration of all the wonderful things we just knew would come to pass.  So much time ahead. So many adventures to have.

Now as we put more decades behind us, we look to a new one and think:  how many more of these do I get to have?  If we stay stuck in that thinking, we might as well take a cappuccino and sugar doughnut and assume the fetal position.  It’s understandably a little jarring to see where the sand is in the hourglass.

But life is for the living.  Nothing has really changed, because so much is out there before us.  We can have any adventure we choose (if you’ve always wanted to join the Merchant Marines, do it.  Granted, passing the physical might be a bit tricky). If we really want to finally learn how to windsurf or fly to Havana for cigars and music or, as Lily Tomlin said so many years ago, get even with the phone company, this is our chance.

And with some exceptions of course, what holds us back is not so much our bodies.  It’s our minds. It’s easier to stay in the way of thinking that makes us comfortable. Where the music is always at a certain volume. And the temperature is just right. And everything works just as simply and reliably as it once did.  And we don’t have to learn anything new.

That’s OLD thinking.  And nothing will age us faster.

We were never content to accept everything our parents liked…music, hairstyles, clothes, politics, attitudes. So why would we want to stay stuck now, refusing to tap into the energy of changing times…especially when by doing so, we can connect with younger people and have real conversations and meaningful moments with children and grandchildren?

My father used to call others his age “old fogies” or “old fossils.”  Even as an elderly man, he made a distinction between those who seemed to have given up on so many things and those who did not. Think about it:  have you ever enjoyed being around an angry older person?  Someone who seems to just be angry about the world all the time?  It’s not fun.

Especially when you also can be around someone who’s as full of life as ever, greeting each new day with gratitude and wonder.  I’ve always said everyone should have at least one friend who is over 80.  It’s important.  It teaches you something.  And as we baby boomers and beyond approach being the older or oldest one in the room, let’s hope we become that wise, patient, fun-loving senior that people of all ages want to be around.

Of course, as we age, we all carry the scars and bruises of our lives. Sadness, worry, poor health and disappointments are part of our DNA now.  We are who we are.  And it’s perfectly fine for us to reminisce, to look fondly upon the scrapbook photos (remember those?) at times where no one had a cell phone at the beach, or had to use 3 remotes to turn on the television, or a Sunday newspaper actually hit the front door. 

But if we fight what’s new now…if we dig our heels in the ground and declare we aren’t willing to learn new technology and new ways of doing things, we’re going to get old very, very fast.

I don’t know about you, but I don’t like that prospect.  I certainly am discerning about which “new” things I take the time to make part of my life, but I don’t want to shut my mind to any of it. I might miss something. I might even discover I like it.

I’m not going backwards.  

Each birthday just means I’m better!  (Just ask my dog.)

The 2020’s are here….think young!

“If you think you’ve peaked, find a new mountain.”     Anonymous