It’s a new year. A new decade. A new life perhaps.
In our 20s and 30s, this would be grounds for a major celebration of all the wonderful things we just knew would come to pass. So much time ahead. So many adventures to have.
Now as we put more decades behind us, we look to a new one and think: how many more of these do I get to have? If we stay stuck in that thinking, we might as well take a cappuccino and sugar doughnut and assume the fetal position. It’s understandably a little jarring to see where the sand is in the hourglass.
But life is for the living. Nothing has really changed, because so much is out there before us. We can have any adventure we choose (if you’ve always wanted to join the Merchant Marines, do it. Granted, passing the physical might be a bit tricky). If we really want to finally learn how to windsurf or fly to Havana for cigars and music or, as Lily Tomlin said so many years ago, get even with the phone company, this is our chance.
And with some exceptions of course, what holds us back is not so much our bodies. It’s our minds. It’s easier to stay in the way of thinking that makes us comfortable. Where the music is always at a certain volume. And the temperature is just right. And everything works just as simply and reliably as it once did. And we don’t have to learn anything new.
That’s OLD thinking. And nothing will age us faster.
We were never content to accept everything our parents liked…music, hairstyles, clothes, politics, attitudes. So why would we want to stay stuck now, refusing to tap into the energy of changing times…especially when by doing so, we can connect with younger people and have real conversations and meaningful moments with children and grandchildren?
My father used to call others his age “old fogies” or “old fossils.” Even as an elderly man, he made a distinction between those who seemed to have given up on so many things and those who did not. Think about it: have you ever enjoyed being around an angry older person? Someone who seems to just be angry about the world all the time? It’s not fun.
Especially when you also can be around someone who’s as full of life as ever, greeting each new day with gratitude and wonder. I’ve always said everyone should have at least one friend who is over 80. It’s important. It teaches you something. And as we baby boomers and beyond approach being the older or oldest one in the room, let’s hope we become that wise, patient, fun-loving senior that people of all ages want to be around.
Of course, as we age, we all carry the scars and bruises of our lives. Sadness, worry, poor health and disappointments are part of our DNA now. We are who we are. And it’s perfectly fine for us to reminisce, to look fondly upon the scrapbook photos (remember those?) at times where no one had a cell phone at the beach, or had to use 3 remotes to turn on the television, or a Sunday newspaper actually hit the front door.
But if we fight what’s new now…if we dig our heels in the ground and declare we aren’t willing to learn new technology and new ways of doing things, we’re going to get old very, very fast.
I don’t know about you, but I don’t like that prospect. I certainly am discerning about which “new” things I take the time to make part of my life, but I don’t want to shut my mind to any of it. I might miss something. I might even discover I like it.
I’m not going backwards.
Each birthday just means I’m better! (Just ask my dog.)
The 2020’s are here….think young!
“If you think you’ve peaked, find a new mountain.” Anonymous
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